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Talk:The Warrior's Beginning (original version)/@comment-2142396-20180612175810
I'm way beyond on this, but I'm slowly catching up and so I'll comment on chapters 8 and 9. Haha, Brek made it pretty far together with Wandering Rubies troupe if he managed to ride with them for almost two weeks before he got caught! By the way, it was surprisingly easy for me to get used to calling him with his new name, probably because it starts with the same sound. ;) And yeah, maybe stowing away with a traveling circus wasn't his best idea... In a way, one of the possible solutions for Ballow would've been to try and send Brek home with any merchants or travelers heading to Evenglade, but considering that the north doesn't seem to be very densely populated it stands to reason that it would be almost impossible to find such travelers. Oh, and Jazmine officially became my favourite out of Wandering Rubies, though Ballow is close behind her, as his love for dramatic gestures makes him so amusing. Heh, Salley's relationship with Tynek is going to be... interesting. In your first version their animosity didn't really start until Rose's 'death', and there I see certain mistrust between them even now, though it's mostly one-sided and coming from Salley. In a way, I can understand her, since Tynek was the reason they went on this quest to begin with, and he has the misfortune of being the bearer of bad news, so Salley is pretty much frustrated with the situation. Besides, meeting someone who looks practically like your spitting image can be quite eerie – I mean, in the first version of TWB I had an impression that golden-furred mice were rare, but not exceptional, so the connection between Sayna and Martin/Tynek wasn't drawn until FWC. And now Aimon immediately deduces that they are both connected to the old kings of Mossflower – well, that's certainly going to put a lot of pressure on both Salley and Tynek. However, I feel that Salley isn't even giving Tynek a chance, and that's a bit surprising considering how quickly she accepted Groddil. I can see now what you meant when you said that the story only really starts with Tynek bringing Groddil and Aimon news of Badrang's plans of subjugating the north. ;P Or rather, it could be said that the real action starts when Groddil finds out that Verdauga himself is coming to the north. Well, that was the twist that I didn't anticipate, that not Badrang turned out to be the main threat, but Verdauga. Badrang is definitely a villain, one just have to remember the way he treats slaves, but he would've been more of a local force if it wasn't for Verdauga pushing him to expand to the north. It seems that Greeneyes are really building an empire for themselves... And judging by Aimon's reaction to these news, he had seen what Verdauga is capable of firsthand – if I were to guess, I'd say that he had probably lost someone or something dear to him to Verdauga's conquests. After all, just because Aimon is a minor character doesn't mean that he doesn't have a story to tell. Oh, but Groddil barely escaped from Badrang's fort! However, even facing two Necromancers alone, with only Stargazer to help him, he managed to fight back successfully, and almost wrecked the fort in doing so. ;) Though I guess that was largely due to Ferran and Fragorl still recovering from their previous injuries, or maybe the use of Groddil's soul power makes him stronger. *whispers* By the way, I sort of began to low-key ship Ferran and Fragorl. Well, maybe 'ship' is too strong a word, but seeing how much Fragorl cares for Ferran's well-being now that he is wounded and weak definitely gives me an impression that her feelings for him run deeper than the ones of apprentice to her mentor. Ferran, on the other hand, probably only views her as a partner in work. Anyway, I can already foresee that gathering an army to fight Badrang and possibly Verdauga isn't going to be easy for Groddil and Salley. As it was stated, the north is peaceful and not very densely populated, or at the very least there are no great cities like Kotir or Southsward. And it's not like Salley and Tynek can simply go around and declare that they are descendants of Mossflower kings and order everybeast to follow them, especially since they haven't come to terms with that themselves yet... Well, I'll guess I'm going to read and see for myself. ;P